Billy K. Wells

Because his family has a history of insanity that breaks out when a family member hasn't married by the time they are 25 years old, Nikolai Nikolaevich visits a matrimonial firm searching for a bride. But all the candidates are either too fat, too young, too old, too skinny or too ugly,and he turns them all down.

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Professor Pierre is assigned to find a missing heiress whose fortune will go to a worthless relative if she isn't found. He uses most of his dialect ability in the search by posing as a Chinaman, an Englishman, a sailor and a Scotchman, but is unable to find her. He meets his sweetheart at a restaurant and, there, discovers she is the heiress he has been searching for. She breaks off their romance when she finds out she is rich.

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Nickotai (Danny Kaye) needs an eye test and is the first patient of ‘eyetestometist’ Henry Groper.

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Professor Pierre Ginsberg is having wife trouble and, on the advice of his lawyer, sets out to wear her down with kindness; she wants constant entertainment his lawyer promises him that a month of dancing and entertainment will eventually kill her or, at least, calm her down some. The exact opposite happens and Professor Ginsberg stands a good chance of dying himself. He manages to sing a song, in the best Willie Howard style, along the way.

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A store owner, faking injuries after an auto accident, is rehearsed for court by his shady lawyer.

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An ironworker and his equally tough friend decide to leave New Orleans to work as beam-walkers on a New York City skyscraper. This arouses the ire of his Cajun girlfriend who promptly shoots at him as he walks away and then follows him to the Big Apple where she becomes a nightclub performer.

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